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April 17, 2024

What your coffee order says about you

by Alex Lilly3 June 2015

Double Espresso
You’re a workaholic and a leader. You need a caffeine hit and you need it now, seeing as you didn’t get any sleep last night prepping for that meeting/assignment. You know what you want and you’re going to get it, so step aside, peasants.


Long Black
You’re smooth, cool and don’t like to mess around. You manage to be calm and collected, but at the same time you need structure and none of that nonsense associated with milk, sugar, sweeteners and all of those hazelnut and peppermint syrups.


Flat White
You’re a follower and not one for branching out. You’ve ordered the same coffee for eight years and have thought about changing it up but you always back out at the last minute. You’re that person sipping away whilst listening to the latest podcast on your iPad.


Cappuccino
Vintage! So adorable! This was the first trendy coffee to come on the scene, and if you’re still drinking these, you’re probably stuck in the 80s or wish you were part of that generation. You only drink coffee in the morning, as it will keep you up late if you drink any past 3.00pm.


Skim Latte
You look like Victoria Beckham or one of the characters from The Devil Wears Prada, you stylish thing you. You’ve been on a diet since you were 19 and when you Googled how many calories were in a regular latte, you were shaken to your very core.


Soy Latte
You’re either lactose intolerant and still haven’t got over the fact that you have to pay an extra $4.00 or you’re a hard-core vegan/health nut/self-proclaimed foodie who loves that ‘nutty’ flavour. In your spare time, you like to make smoothies with almond milk and chia seeds.


Mocha With Three Sugars
You’re trying to convince everyone that you’re a grown up and have moved on from hot chocolates. You’re sweet, bubbly and if given the choice between a burger and a fillet of beef with a red wine jus, you’d always want the burger (but feel secretly ashamed).


Decaf
Why are you even here?


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